I’m Ready To Have My Wife Back

Fun fact: I have not had a normal night’s sleep in 3 years.  Yup, your read that right – 3 FREAKIN’ years.  Between Tall Mom’s first pregnancy, then a colicky first baby, then the second pregnancy, and now an adorable 5 month old that sleeps randomly and in my bed no less, my sleeping arrangements with my wife have been dubious at best.  

But, this got me thinking – I miss my wife.  

Like, a lot. 

It’s never just us anymore.  But, I had one conversation with her the other night on a date night that made me realize there’s a light coming.  I’m ready to have my wife back – and here are the reasons why…

Tall Mom and I had our first real date night in nearly 5 months the other night.  We went to dinner, and shared a dessert at one of our favorite local pastry shops.  ::GASP::  What a night out, right? Just like the good ol’ days.

I just want to have an adult conversation that didn’t involve the words: pee pee, poopy, potty, diaper(s), or Dragon.


I love my kids, I really do.  But, (call me a bad dad and I’m fine with that) I love my wife more.  Without us, there are no kids.  And, that is the promise we made to one another before we even stepped foot outside the car when we brought BOTH our newborns into the house: we put each other first.

Of course, I’ve been thinking about this notion for a long time.  I’ve always want to have more time with my wife.  But, it was our date night the other night that made me realize that I MISS my wife.

I just miss being with her.

So as much as I have ALWAYS known how important date nights are, I’ve got to say that I fully understand their importance now in  a big way.  

In other words, my life is nothing without my wife.  We make each other go – and the quicker that I understand that, and the quicker you understand that about your spouse, the better off your relationship will be.

Dates don’t need to be these huge elaborate events.  In fact, you don’t even really need to go out.  Just get out for a walk.  Better yet – stay home and just get away from your kids. 

Have peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, drink juice, and wear pajamas for all I care. 

Just sit down, and TALK with your spouse. It’s so easy to forget how little you actually talk to your wife/husband.

When we went out on our date, we just laughed about stupid movies we watched, we talked about the latest goings on in France, we reminisced about our wedding, we even talked about short term as well as long terms plans for our media company. We just looked in each others eyes while realizing how far we’ve come from meeting on match.com in 2007 to all of a sudden having two kids, a house on the East Side of Providence, owning our own business, and everything in between.

Your spouse is special.

They are interesting.

They actually kinda rock.

Which is why you married them, right?

Maybe you already know this.  Maybe you already had a night like mine when you rediscovered how truly spectacular your relationship is with them.  If so, congrats.  If not, however – heed these words with great care.  Your spouse rocks.  Enjoy them.

Date nights are like gold.  Nah – I’m going to go even further and put in a sci-fi reference here.  They’re as special as Vibranium (the special stuff that Captain America’s shield is made out of.)

The problem for me is that I suffer from frequent and severe headaches.  And I swear to all that is holy that I will never allow them to get in the way of my future date nights.

Here’s a few products that I take before/ during my date nights to make sure my headaches or anything else don’t get in the way and that the night can keep going and never be interrupted:

3. My favorite cologne – I know it sounds stupid, but this is one of those things that you easily forget because your busy with the kids, and you’ve got better things to worry about.  And you also forget about this because it’s been so long since you’ve dated and that smell was such an important factor in why you were originally attracted to your spouse.  Simple.  Silly. Maybe even overthought.  All are possibly true.  But think about it.

4. ChapStick Total Hydration – Here’s a fun fact about me – I’ve never used chapstick.  Not once.  I always kid with my wife that I’m the next step in human evolution because of this and for a myriad of other reasons (more on those for another post perhaps 🙂  But, why do I include ChapStick in this post?  Because my wife (especially in the winter) is such a slave to it.  She needs it so bad because her poor lips become dried and chapped the second she walks outside. But as much as I adore Tall Mom, she may or may not be the most organized person on the planet.  As such, I always keep a stick in my car so that when she inevitably complains about her chapped lips and the fact that she can’t find her stick that she so desperately needs, I’m right there to rescue the day and fix her ailment.  Not only do I look like a hero for carrying it, but then I get the rightfully deserved kiss because of it.  Win-win.

5. My wallet – yes, that’s right, my wallet.  Of course, I have to bring it because I pay for stuff with it.  Obviously. But there is more to it than you think.  My wallet was the first present my wife ever gave me all the way back in 2007.  It’s old, ratty, beat to heck, and I should probably get rid of it.  I pull it out at parties, dinners, or whatever and people can’t help but comment on it.  But, you know what? It’s special to me.  It reminds me of how much Tall Mom and I go through, we’re going to be ok.  We may take a few hits, and some edges may be frayed, but we’re special.  So when I break it out before I pay for a drink, or a meal, I always show Tall Mom my wallet – yes, to remind her how much we’re spending haha, but also to let her know that she’s still the most special thing to me.  So, find your wallet. Find that one thing that your spouse gave you that reminds you about how special they are.  Bring it with you, show them, and start the conversation about what makes you guys unique and special together.

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